NYC teachers narratives on report
Actual comments made by NYC teachers on their report cards as part
of their final narratives.
All teachers were reprimanded, but these are great!
1. Since my last report, your child has hit rockbottom and has started
2. I would not allow this student to breed.
3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.
4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
5. Your son sets low personal standards and then
consistently fails to achieve them.
6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic
thing to hold it all together.
7. This child has been working with glue too much.
8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't
10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice
11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat
out 1,000,000 others.
12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.